Saturday, September 20, 2008

Hubs, Facebook, and Existentialist Questions

Hubs signed up for Facebook well before me, but I think he's finally hooked now, this weekend, after I pestered him to sign in and check out the flair I sent him. I've been sick with this ridiculous sinus infection for over a week now, so I've spent too much time messing around with Facebook and finding every possible feature with which to amuse myself. This includes too much time playing that addictive Word Challenge, making and sending flair, sending virtual beer/coffee/flowers, and posting a lot of family photos. I also stalked down a couple of cousins and added them as friends and checked out Causes, which is a pretty neat tool to raise awareness for non-profits. I've been sending invitations this week to tell more people about Rivers of the World...

A few weeks ago, Ben Mathes, the president of Rivers of the World, preached the sermon at my church. Ben is also an ordained Presbyterian minister, and his message that Sunday about being led to do Christ's work, particularly in ways that you don't always expect or that don't fit with the way you perceive yourself, really connected with me. The work that he does through and with Rivers of the World is truly amazing. The organization works with populations that live in river basins all over the world on projects to help them, in a respectful and productive approach that targets the needs of that population and location. With all of the questions and worries I've had over the past months about the direction my life will take from here, and with the way that I've been searching for guidance about where my skills and gifts can be used best - teaching college kids? working with kids at church? being a mom? - Ben's message encouraged me to worry less and just go with it. I'm not a particularly outgoing person, and particularly not so when it comes to discussing my faith, but I am trying to get better about turning over control and recognizing that I don't have to have all the answers and know the plan for rest of my life. I can do the work that I am doing now - and I find so much of it very fulfilling - and if I am led in another direction, then I can make a change later.

Anyway, I'm wandering far away from the point where this post began, but I do feel strongly about the concept of being led, of learning to relinquish some control (in a sensible, thoughtful way) and maybe listen more carefully for a call, or a nudge, to where I should be at any given time. And I think that so much of the work that Rivers of the World takes people out of their typical lives and lets them go to another place and use their unique gifts and skills to help others. I want to be able to do that, somehow. Maybe in a river basin in another country at some point, but for now, just here, in this town that sometimes drives me crazy, I want to feel like I'm doing something meaningful and productive that I enjoy and that somehow helps other people too. So I'll keep mulling over that in my worrying fashion but try not to get too stressed about it. Yeah, like that will be easy.

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