ZZZZZZzzzzzzz.....

I snore when I'm pregnant. I know this from previous pregnancies - the combination of a little stuffiness (which seems to last throughout pregnancy for me) and extra weight cause it. So I know I do it - I'm not in denial like SOME PEOPLE who live in this house and share the bed with me...

I've learned, after nine years of marriage, to tune out his snoring and sleep through it. But last night he woke me up repeatedly to tell me to stop snoring! Dude - I can't help it! I'm laying on my side, so it's not as if changing positions will stop it! Grrr. I'm just a little frustrated with his hypocrisy. He denies snoring. I've threatened to record him to prove my point, but he'd probably deny even in the face of that evidence.

He actually asked me to wait an hour after he goes to bed, so he can be sound asleep by the time I get there - so he doesn't have to listen to me! The nerve of that man....

{end vent}

The Delt Duck is Dead!

Well, actually, the Delt duck cracked open from old age and rot and ceased to be watertight. And any bath toy which isn't watertight, and thus has the potential to mildew inside, gets trashed around here. Sorry, Delt Duck.*

So we're in the market for a new Daddy Duck for the bathtime duck family. We have a Mommy duck and two kid ducks, in case you wondered. A long time ago we had a purple duck and a green duck too, but they weren't watertight, and, well, they aren't around anymore. I'm kind of stubborn about that, and I refuse to spend the time required to clean out bathtoys with bleach water on a regular basis.

KMart? No ducks, except a bag of assorted squirt ducks (squirt = water = mildew). Walmart was similarly duckless. So I have turned to the internet. And while I discovered a vast array of ducks in various professions and attires, I have not conclusively found one that says it's watertight. So I'm going to check Toys in the Attic downtown (where I may find a duck that I can purchase for a little more money, but, hey, I'd be supporting a local business and I'd get to inspect the duck in person) before I take a chance on an internet duck. Wish me luck. The natives have been grousing for a new duck for days, and I'm eager to complete this mission.

*Delt Duck: This sturdy vintage duck apparently dates back to some unknown brother(s) in the Delta Tau Delta house at the alma mater. Hubs inherited the duck, along with other questionable "artifacts," from his brethren. The duck had a dark red stripe on him - paint? wood stain? marker? of unknown origins and sailed the seas of our bathtub proudly for many years, before succumbing to old age and rot. Hubs was horrified to hear that I had sent the Delt Duck to the dump, but by then it was too late and, well, we have enough stuff in this house without hanging on to cute-but-mildrewy ducks. Besides, I always wondered about the dubious early years of that duck. Who knows how much debauchery, how many frat parties and keg stands he witnessed.

That "Christmas is coming" feeling

I've got that strange feeling in my stomach - the fluttery, jumpy sensation that I used to get as a kid when I couldn't wait to see what Santa would bring me. My whole body feels jittery, and not just from the pain meds I'm still taking. So many things are about to change - good things, for the most part - and I feel as though I'm on the brink of something new and different.

Hubs is graduating with his MBA tonight. After 18 long months, he's finished. He's been so busy, reading, working on projects, writing papers, that it seems almost like he's been traveling and has just come home again. There are so many things I want to do that have been put off for the last year and a half. Places I want to go as a family. Projects I want us to do together. Time spent together in the kitchen, cooking and baking delicious things. And now that he's finally finished, now that he will have a little more time for us and a little less stress, it's like I don't know or remember what I wanted to do. If I'm being honest, I've really resented his absences and his lack of time and attention to our family for all of these months, and now that he's (theoretically) back, I don't know how to handle it. The kids and I have developed routines and practices that will have to be adjusted to include him, and, well, I'm bossy and stubborn, so that might be a little harder for me than it sounds on the surface.

Beyond that, our little Big Girl is beginning kindergarten next week. I can't believe that's she's old enough for that. I'm sick with worry that she might encounter bullies and/or mean girls again this year. The thought of her at school all day, while I'm on the other side town, brings me to tears. She's confident and excited and eager for school to start, so I'm trying not to let my unsteady emotional state affect her.

Three will be in preschool again. He'll still be nearby, in the preschool at the church where I work. He's a little jealous of his big sister who has plans to ride the school bus to her new school, but I'm relieved that I'll at least have him close to me for a couple of years yet. Plus he's a little more sociable and outgoing, so I haven't had the same concerns with him. Big Girl has some of my nervousness and unease about large groups of kids her age - I always do better with one-on-one situations when it comes to making friends. I try not to read too much of myself into her life, because I think that could get dangerous. But at the same time, I don't want her to have the difficulties, the painful experiences of feeling like an outsider that still plague me today.

On a positive note, I'm almost finished with the kidney stone business. The pain and the difficulty getting anyone to treat them have taken a toll on me. I'm prone to being a slacker anyway - I'd rather read books than get the house in order almost any day - so the disorder in my house has grown into full-fledged chaos in the last five months. I feel as though I've lost so much enthusiasm and interest at home and at work. I just hope I can figure out a way to revive the drive I used to have. I've been thinking that writing more regularly here may help in that regard - to give me some accountability.

And another one bites the dust...

My kidney stones have proved exceptionally stubborn, but after two lithotripsies and one ureteroscopy, I'm almost finished with them. Praise God.

Tomorrow I have the last lithotripsy - ironically, this one will finally target the stone on my left side that caused the initial pain that got me started on this long road - and I hope and pray that the little thing will be blown to bits and will make a hasty exit. This weekend I've been recovering from Friday's ureteroscopy, and with any luck tomorrow's procedure will be quick and effective.

Then I will start doing whatever I can to prevent stones from forming again. It's hard to find a lot of definitive direction on the topic, but I'll be drinking lots of fluids, particularly lemonade, and avoiding dehydration. There may be some dietary changes I can make as well. I'm still trying to figure out more on the subject. This bout has been the worse kidney stone episode I've experienced, but not the only one by a long shot. I wouldn't wish these on anyone.

My garden has survived and produced well despite my uneven attentions to it this summer. I had hopes of blogging the gardening "experience" more thoroughly, but I've just had too much on my plate thus far. Fortunately the fam and I have enjoyed some delicious squash, fresh corn, and tomatoes, and I've got oodles of hot peppers to use at present, too.

And Hubs is finished with all of his coursework, ready to graduate later this week, so perhaps the two of us can get back to some of our favorite cooking conspiracies in the coming weeks and months! I'm so proud of all of the work he has put into getting his MBA, but I am also incredibly relieved that it's finally complete!

Did Dave Ramsey watch a lot of Dragnet?

Envelope budgeting, made famous by Dave Ramsey, makes a cameo in a 1968 episode of Dragnet. Hubs and I have been watching Dragnet and Emergency! episodes on RetroTV lately and I starting laughing when I saw the envelope scene between Friday and Gannon early in this episode.

A little overwhelming

Hubs is leaving for an extended trip on Thursday. He'll be in China for 10 days, touring around with a group from his grad school cohort. I'm so excited for him, and I really hope he'll make the most of this opportunity to learn and see and question. But I'm also a little overwhelmed with the prospect of being the solo parent for so long. Fortunately, I have family nearby, so in a pinch I have help available. But for all of my whining and complaining about how Hubs needs to help more around the house and with the kids, the truth is he already does a good bit. Sure, he's busy with classwork and work-work in the evenings and on the weekends, but he's here, to listen to me when I need a friendly ear. He has my back, even when he has a lot of other obligations (and thank goodness he's only a few months away from finishing that MBA). But I think that I'll be a little overwhelmed, as well as a little lonely, while he's away. I'll be praying for lots and lots of patience, because Big Girl and Two certainly know how to exhaust my pitifully short supply some days...

Thoughts, in no particular order

1. Kids sure are germy. I really didn't need to catch this bug from Big Girl. I've been miserably congested, snotty, coughing, bleh for days...

2. Two is now attempting to exploit his drippy nose, even though he's mostly better, as an excuse to skip school. The kid's only two. He told me he needed to stay home today because he was too sick to go to school. He really just wanted to watch Bob the Builder and eat fruit snacks.

3. Why, exactly, is Big Girl such a whiner about getting water in her eyes while bathing? Not soap - just water! It annoys me a little, although I'm trying my best to be patient and help her work through it.

4. Two LOVES baths, and showers, but only the playing in the water part. He doesn't actually want to be soaped up and cleaned. And he whines when it's over and he has to get out.

5. I got a lot of stuff at the Walmart this morning, stuff we needed. And yet there's still no food in the house. Well, nothing quick and easy. If I wanted to soak some dried beans and make a soup from scratch, we'd be set...

6. Hubs' car is paid off! Yay! We're making some progress, although at times it seems more like treading water.

7. Some days I fear that my children have inherited some of my worst qualities. But then they do sweet things and surprise me, and I don't worry so much.

8. Tissue manufacturers have a pretty good racket on their hands. We're going through lots o' boxes around here. Even with the tissue boxes placed out of kid reach, so they can't be as wasteful and playful with them as they wish...

9. When they were younger, both Big Girl and Two had more adventurous palates. I miss that. I bet they would both shun Indian food now, whereas Big Girl ate everything we got her from the buffet at our favorite restaurant back in NC.

10. I'm really slack sometimes. I still haven't mailed a gift to a friend that I meant to mail over a month ago. It's boxed up by the front door and has been sitting there for over a week.

A series of quick thoughts:

I wish I had the space, setting, and mental energy to grow a garden. Not going to happen this year, but I can dream.

I have too much crap in my house. Every day I find more and more, and I don't need so much of it.

People who don't turn on their headlights when it starts to get dark - particularly the ones who drive dark cars - scare me. I get really unnerved when I realize there's a car there and I can barely see it.

In a related note, I'm sometimes one of those annoying people who will flash her headlights on and off to try to tell approaching cars that they need to turn on their headlights.

My dogs are wrestling on the back deck again. Do they do this all the time, or do they wait until it's quiet enough for me to hear them out there making a racket?

I also wish I had a good spot for a large chest deep freezer, in which I could keep the produce from my imagined garden, along with smaller portions of soups and stews to heat and eat for weeknight meals.

Green/red/yellow bell peppers are over-used in prepared foods, particularly the frozen stuff like skillet meals. They don't taste that good, just strong, plus they make me sick to my stomach. And I hate having to study the ingredients list to see if they're in a product before I buy it. I've learned not to rely upon the picture of the meal on the packaging.

Hubs and I bought a Dyson early in our marriage, and it continues to serve us well (knock on wood). It's parked in this room at present. It's not the special pet-fur model but it still did a decent job with dog fur back when we had indoor dogs.

This colder weather is making me get really dry, itchy skin. Yuck.

My daughter's recent decision not to eat tater tots, french fries, and the like puzzles me. I wondered where she got it from. She used to eat these delicious potato products and love them. Almost as much as her brother, who would subsist on Sonic tater tots and fruit juice alone if permitted.

Hubs got me a label maker for Valentine's Day and I love it. I mentioned this at work today and got some weird looks, but I think it's one of the best gifts he's given me in years.

I wonder what I should start calling Two on this blog after he turns three in April... I could still call him Two, since he's the second in birth order, but would that be confusing?

Speaking of birth order - I've read several studies and articles discussing the impact of birth order on a child's development, and I think it's really interesting. I watch for signs of the influence of birth order in my own kids, and I can definitely see some of it at work in Hubs' family. Alas, I am an only child, but that has its influence as well.

A Most Excellent Day

Hubs got it this year. No boxes of assorted chocolates, which I've never liked that much. A sweet, thoughtful card. A new hand mixer (!) to replace the one that died a couple of months ago. And a label maker. I think the label maker is my favorite. Have I mentioned my love of office supplies? Now I can label my stuff. And the kids' stuff. I'm excited! He did very well this year.

I hope he liked his presents. I made him an appointment for a massage, which he said he really enjoyed, and I got a rolling laundry hamper for our room. And a couple of movies on DVD that he will hopefully enjoy.

Today has been a very low-key day. My sweet Big Girl is still sick, coughing and dripping and miserable, and she has a bad raw area around her nose from a bit of rough treatment with the tissues. I got her the soft ones, but she's a little too fervent in her nose-wiping sometimes. I'm trying to teach her to pay and blow, not wipe so hard, but her little nose is pitiful and raw.

Two may be getting it too. He has coughed a few times - no nose issues yet, knock on wood. The way the two of them play together and love on each other (when not wrestling), they tend to share all of their germs freely. Fortunately they're out of school next week, so there's plenty of time for them to rest and recover.

I made monte cristo sandwiches for dinner, at Hubs' request. They were good. I even used Wonder Bread for him - he purchased a loaf for that purpose, although I would never buy the stuff. I like good, hearty wheat breads. But the results were good, despite the questionable "bread" he required. We also ate well earlier with Hubs' special French toast, so that this day was a steady progression of unhealthy and tasty foods. The kids ate too many tractor snacks and were briefly wild and energized. They're addicted to them, and are also really stocked about the new Wonder Pets snacks, too (have I mentioned that Two can sing the entire Wonder Pets theme song? in addition to childhood classics like Twinkle, Twinkle).

What a week!

This week has been so busy with all kinds of pre-holiday activities, health issues, and more. Two and Big Girl both missed a day of school while Two had a short-lived stomach bug (didn't want to chance sending in Big Girl in case she had it too). They both enjoyed class parties on Wednesday, and tomorrow they'll both be singing in the preschool Christmas musical performance. I'm really looking forward to seeing that - this will be Two's first time singing for an audience, and I'm interested to see how he reacts.

This morning I had a kidney stone. Could have done without that early Christmas gift. Fortunately it moved along at a quick pace, so I'm feeling much better.

And then tonight, Hubs and I get to enjoy a holiday party! The kids will stay with their grandparents while we go. It's been so long since we've had any adult time, gone anywhere without the kids, and it will be nice to enjoy conversation without the interruptions to "stop hitting your sister" and "leave your brother alone."

I just saw a preview for an episode of Rachel Ray in which couples go to a hypnotist to see if the hypnotist can fix an annoying habit that drives the spouse crazy. They showed a man who left dirty laundry piled all over the house, and the wife who hated picking up after him. I wonder if a hypnotist would be a useful approach to get Hubs to clean the house while I sit on the sofa and read? Without any complaints or grumbling from Hubs while he works, of course. Yeah, it wouldn't be nice or fair of me, but it's still a strangely appealing idea...

Baby Fever

I think I have a mild-to-moderate case of baby fever. Big Girl asked for a baby sister for Christmas, and I thought, "Oh. That's not a bad idea." And then I just watched a video that one of my college roommates posted online, of her daughter rolling over for the first time, and with that the baby fever really kicked in. On an intellectual level, I know that I get incredibly sick when I'm pregnant, and I feel nauseated and wretched for the entire nine months, and yet... babies! So cute! So sweet! And I've thought for a long time that our family isn't necessarily complete at this point. With everything going on in our lives right now, the timing isn't good at all, so I guess I'll tuck this away and revisit the idea in a few months. And I'll try to keep my baby fever to myself, at least for a little while.

On a related note: I wonder if men every really get baby fever in the way that women do? Hubs didn't really get interested in the kids until they started interacting with him. Before that, he cared for them and spent time with them, but once they started to give back in terms of attention, conversation, etc. - he was hooked. That's when they became really cool to him, in ways that I hadn't observed before.

Hubs and Brie

Hubs loves to bake brie in various ways and spread it on yummy crackers. Always delicious! The kids love it, my relatives are suitably impressed by his culinary prowess, and it's quite simple. You can make baked brie with a round or cylindrical piece of brie. Here are his two similar-yet-different recipes:

Using a round wheel of brie - cut the skin stuff off the top. Place the brie in an oven-safe dish, and sprinkle the top with brown sugar and sliced almonds. Bake in oven at 400 degrees until runny and hot. Scoop hot cheese out of middle and spread on to crackers of your choice.

Using a cylindrical log-shaped brie - scrape skin stuff off. Take a flat pie crust and sprinkle brown sugar on it, and maybe drizzle some honey. Wrap it around the brie log and top with some more brown sugar and slices of almonds (yeah, we like almonds around here). Bake until pie crust is nicely browned. Slice and serve.

We took the latter to my grandmother's house today as an appetizer before the enormous Thanksgiving feast. Two and Big Girl monged significant quantities, as did all of my relatives, and they all thought it was super-fancy. But it's really, really easy. It makes a good, quick thing to serve at holiday parties - we've served it for New Year's Eve before as well.

That Hubs - bad influence!

He started a conversation with me early this morning, while I was still in a semi-comatose state, asking if he should go out and get some breakfast for all of us to eat before church. I mumbled in approval. He returned a short time later with a box of Bojangles Cinnamon Sweet Biscuits. These deliciously sinful concoctions are based on a rich, buttery biscuit, which is then smothered in butter, cinnamon, and sweet icing. They are, as Two says, "mmmmm... nummy!" This pronouncement is typically accompanied by the clapping of buttery, sticky fingers and a big sticky smile. Big Girl was also articulate on the subject of breakfast: "Mmmm! Tanks, Daddy!"

So much for my healthy daily breakfast of Special K. It was a very sweet start to the day. Since I was already off the wagon, I tossed a couple of spoonfuls of cocoa mix in my coffee mug for a hot mocha treat.

A match made in "Space. The Final Frontier."

Hubs and I took the kids over to my parents' house to spend the afternoon. As we were drive back, I noticed that yet another new business had opened in a strip mall along our route. This particular location has housed numerous businesses, none of which have lasted long, and the latest is a tattoo parlor. I pointed it out to Hubs, who jokingly suggested that we stop and get matching tattoos. And then, our inner nerds kicked into overdrive:

Hubs: I know what the coolest tattoo would be.
Me: What's that?
Hubs: A communicator. Right here, on my chest.
Me: Oooh, good idea.
Hubs: Then when we go swimming and I get thirsty, I can just hit the communicator and say, "Wife! Beer me!"
Me: Uh huh. And you think that'll really work?
Hubs: Yeah! That would be the best tattoo ever! But I guess we couldn't get matching ones.
Me: Oh really?
Hubs: Yeah, you've got boobs. I wouldn't want you to expose your boob in the tattoo parlor to get that.

Note that, at no point in this conversation, was it necessary for us to clarify that we were referring to Star Trek. We both just knew.

In related nerd news, we spotted a collector's set of Star Trek Pez dispensers for sale at Kroger. This would make a fine Christmas gift for any Star Trek-loving, Pez-dispenser-collecting nerds in your life. I hope Hubs will refrain from purchasing this, as we already have far too many Pez dispensers in our home. It's one of those cooler-in-the-store-than-my-home things.

Hubs is a good guy

Hubs told me last night that he would be taking off time from work to take care of me. Three days - I'm blown away by his thoughtfulness and generosity. Seriously. This is - dare I say it - a bit out of character for him. I don't think he took off this much time after the birth of our first child (but then he was paid hourly, not salaried, so that kind of explains it).

The kids are staying with my parents tonight, and we dropped them off early this morning so my parents could take them to school and we could head over to the office for my surgery. The surgery went pretty well. I can't say that I feel good now, but I am focused on feeling better eventually. The medication is keeping me fairly comfortable so far.

Hubs has been incredibly sweet and thoughtful. He got me a yummy Starbucks concoction after we left the doctor's office (they have an ambulatory surgical center at the office) and picked up tasty foods at the grocery store while the pharmacist filled my prescription. I just wolfed down a chicken pot pie - I couldn't eat after 10 last night, and I was really hungry.

I don't want to make him sound like a bum, but I really can't remember the last time he took care of me like this. It's wonderful. He's a thoughtful guy most of the time, but he's being particularly good today. When I'm back on my feet, I'll have to do something nice to reinforce this kind of behavior. ;)

Political Paraphenalia

Do you wear buttons to support your favorite candidate? Put bumper stickers or magnets on your car? Put yard signs by the road in front of your house?

It's really interesting to me to see who puts out signs or labels their cars in my hometown. A lot of people here just don't do that, no matter what their political leanings. My parents, for example: I can't imagine them ever making their political choices public in that fashion, although they will discuss their thoughts on politics with me. They're not the types, however, to introduce politics into a discussion with friends or bring up an election at a social gathering.

I was raised by these people, and yet in college I plastered my old used Volvo with politically-inspired stickers. I think part of it was a recognition that my views differed strongly from those of most of my fellow students. I attended a rather conservative school, where I was part of the liberal minority. This experience was not unlike living in my hometown, which is located in the heart of red-state territory in the south. I don't start arguments or confront people, however, when I find that my views differ from theirs. I think it's part of my "genteel" upbringing: talking about politics too much has always seemed a little rude to me, at least when it leads to an ideological clash.

In grad school, I was in the middle of a liberal haven, and on a certain level, I loved being in a place where many of the local officials shared my views and predelictions. It always felt a little odd, however. I wasn't used to being a part of the political majority, and I sometimes even felt oddly conservative in comparison to others, if that makes any sense. Perhaps it was my openness to accepting others' viewpoints, and living harmoniously with others who disagree with me? While I often agreed with the views of those around me, I sometimes found in some of them a bias toward others who disagreed with them. To be fair, I often found this same bias in my conservative friends and classmates in college. Perhaps the best way to describe it is an incredulity, an inability to believe that anyone who disagreed with their position could be intelligent, thoughtful, worthy of respect and acceptance. I suppose some people might see that as a flaw in me, my desire to be tolerant of other views to the point that I rarely fight for my position and challenge others with any sense of vehemence.

Anyway, this leads me back to my topic. I don't have any signs or stickers or magnets. I've been very tempted to put up a sign, to put a magnet on my van, but I haven't, because Hubs asked me not to do it. And he agreed not to label his car or put up any of his signs - which would not feature the same candidate's name - in return. Oh, I have been so tempted, particularly since signs for my candidate are rare in this town. On my parents' street, I've seen five signs for the "old white dude" and only one for Obama. And I was surprised to see that one. I asked the woman who lives there why she decided to put the sign in her yard, and she said she, like me, wasn't one to put out political signs in most cases. But she had seen so many McCain signs around town, and so few Obama signs, that she felt like potential Obama voters might feel like there was no need to vote, as if they were so outnumbered that it didn't matter. So she put out a sign to let them know they weren't alone, to keep the faith in our very red town.

And that's when I really wanted to put out a sign, too. But I didn't. No need to start that fight with Hubs. I've been trying to avoid politics entirely in our discussions, because he keeps trying to show me the error of my ways. You would think that he would know better after eight years of marriage, but apparently not. No, I won't put out a sign or put a magnet on my car to counter all of the stickers I see on cars around town, but I'll put my choice out here, on my blog, in my own indirect way. Hubs never reads what I write here anyway.

Not quite the same...

I'm making the Barefoot Contessa recipe for Pear, Apple, and Cranberry Crisp that I mentioned in a previous post, only things never go according to plan around here. Craisins are a popular snack food among the natives, and I discovered that the bag of craisins I bought for this recipe have been devoured. I have three suspects, and it's likely a conspiracy. Fortunately I had a very large container of raisins, and plenty of them are left.

Then, as I got to the topping portion of the recipe, I discovered that Hubs had used the last of the butter. In fact, the fridge is looking suspiciously bare on several fronts. So he's bringing more home when he gets back from the library, and I'll be able to finish the recipe. We'll have it for dessert this evening, after the herbed pork tenderloin with rice and carrots. I'm feeling positively domestic!

Sweet Misery: A Poisoned World

Hubs and I watched this on the Documentary Channel last weekend (see previous post), and it is really frightening to consider the dangers posed by Aspartame. I'm pleased to see that the full documentary is available online. If you haven't seen it already, I highly recommend that you watch Sweet Misery.

My tv-watching secret

With my crazy schedule and the two demanding people who need to be fed, dressed, undressed, bathed, and otherwise loved, I rarely get time to watch most of my favorite shows when they're broadcast. So I love the DVR, but then, I get into fights over the limited storage space with Hubs, who also loves the DVR for its ability to allow him to watch his shows that I can't stand. And so, for those shows that are also available in full online, I have found a fabulous secret. I watch them on my laptop with headphones, when the kids are busy doing other things and sometimes even when Hubs is watching some lame show on the tv in the very same room.

This allows me to watch Bones without fear of my children being scarred by seeing body parts or seeing other images that might give them nightmares (not that Bones is always like that). I also use it to watch other comedies and dramas toward which Hubs has an annoyingly dismissive attitude: Chuck, Eli Stone, Boston Legal, and Dirty Sexy Money. If only Law and Order: Criminal Intent were online in full, I'd be set. Well, no, not really set. Because there are still lots of other shows I love to watch. Yes, I love television.

Conversation, overheard

Hubs: Why did you do that, Big Girl?
Big Girl pauses, then says: Yes?
Hubs: Yes isn't an answer to Why. I asked you why.
Big Girl: No?